Do any of these things sound familiar?
- You feel like a lot of things in your life need changing.
- From the outside, it probably looks to others like your relationship with your partner or spouse is more okay than it actually feels.
- You feel taken-for-granted at work and/or home quite frequently.
- When you think about mindfulness, it honestly seems like a waste of time.
- When you think about making more time for self-care in your life, deep down that seems indulgent and unrealistic for the realities of your life.
- When you do get to slow down, sometimes your purpose does not seem clear.
- You doubt the authenticity of people who seem happy or fulfilled.
- If you look back on your relationships, it seems they often start well, but often they don’t go the distance.
- Quite often you feel frustration or anger in your relationships.
- You are more motivated to reach a goal when direct competition is involved, or you see that someone else has something that you’d like to have or achieve.
- At times you’d just like to take over the controls for someone in your life and finally fix the issues that so obviously need fixing.
- The old adages about “loving yourself” never really made much sense to you.
- It feels irresponsible and even unsafe to imagine stepping back from caring for other people or work projects.
- You used to love your career and felt a natural pull toward professional contribution, but it’s not as strong as it used to be.
- You think, “It must be nice that…” e.g. “some people get to treat themselves.”
- You find yourself fixating on things that aren’t satisfying and cost you money, health or peace like eating too much, obsessing about diet, organizing, redecorating, cleaning, work-a-holism, finding “the perfect”…household item, pair of jeans, etc.
- The world feels like a more disappointing place as you’ve grown older.
- You seem to unintentionally interrupt others in conversations, especially when it’s with someone you don’t know that well yet.
- You have a strong preference to either never be alone or mostly be alone.
- Worry, exhaustion and exasperation are regular parts of your day.
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Jessica is a psychotherapist, relationship and addiction expert, and creator of The Visible Self ® and VisibleU™ system. Over the last 17 years she has helped hundreds of busy adults create healthier habits and more satisfying relationships.
Jessica received her Master’s in Applied Psychology from New York University, and completed mediation training at the Columbia University School of Law. She has held numerous clinical roles, managed clinical operations for a national EAP, and advised executives on employee-relations concerns at Fortune 1000 companies. She lives in St. Louis, Missouri with her husband and a master instructor of mindful living …their Border Collie/Pointer-mix “Abby”.